(no subject)

Everything went according to plan.

The ex-asshole did actually call up and make a date to give out hte boys' presents (courtesy of his parents, so don't get all optimistic abot him) on Saturday. Of course i didn't say anything to the guys because there's a 50-50 chance he'll actually show up. Why are the odds so favourable? Because these presents are visible reminders that he has not been around and how can he tell his girlfriend that he's been keeping in touch with his beloved kids if the presents are still sitting there on the living room floor? As I said before, it is obvious that he has been telling her about his exploits in "doing the right thing" which she bought, hook-line-and-sinker until I said "this is the first I've heard from him in five months"

I have learned that putting candy canes on the xmas tree are just a invitation to hyper-kid syndrome as son number three has been eating CCs for breakfast every morning since the trimming. It took me a few days to catch on, although his completely baffling hyperactivity did give me thoughtful pause. There's only one cane left so I figure 'why spoil his subterfuge this late in the game? He'll probably always treasure this short stint with fooling mommy'.

My dog is much better... her bandages need to be changed and rewrapped more frequently now, but next week we start the skin grafts, hopefullly the stench of exposed flesh will abate once it's covered with natural substance. Frankly, I nearly puked just dealing with the smell last time I rewrapped her up. Of course some of the abrasions are in a very inopportune spot so of course the bandages slip and move and fall to the wayside. Part of the problem is that despite the pain she is obviously in, she keeps moving around as if she is uninjured. When the pain becomes too much she stands still and waits for it to pass. She's fairly depressed about not being able to go outside and run around too, and keeps trying to slip out the door whenever I come inside. This causes me no end of aggravation; I take it personally that she thinks she can just bulldoze her way past me and to the great outdoors (where all of this started BTW). It really pisses me off to have to endure a headbutt to the shins every time I open the door to come home. I suppose I ought to be more understanding but she's been my dog for nearly three years now and she still thinks she can blast her way out despite my yelling, grabbing and dragging her back in every single time. Don't they say insanity is repeating the same thing adn expecting different results? My dog is clearly one with the lunatic fringe.

I'm tired out from all the holiday crapola: that's a first for me.

I won't be going on my trip to Nashville partly because of funding (once again the dog is influencing my decisions), partly because of aka_baphomet (once again I am tailoring my life for someone elses comfort simply because I am too lazy to deal with it any other way). I'm not happy with that for many reasons but it's my ultimate decision and I'll stand by it. Mostly, I would like to see comorbid again, but I also realized I have not been away from this city in more than a year. That's right, I've been here with no "vacation" or similar travelling-for-pleasure for quite some time and I'm kinda grumpy about it. The boys have been numerous places in the last year (compliments of their paternal grandparents), my parents have been off and away a few times, my brother (the one in law school) has taken more than one fun trips and I have meanwhile been sitting here at home wondering if I'll ever go anywhere.

Staring at the walls of my house, I think, might be making me batty.

My resolution is now to keep saving my money in earnest and hopefully go somewhere REALLY different next summer. I'm thinking Milwaukee, Philadelphia, California, New Zealand - anywhere different.

I know this entry is scattered and barely pleasant but I figured some update is better than silence.